I recently took an online test and my results stated that I had a fear of failure. I usually tell people I have a fear of success. Both stink. My fear of failure has been with me for as long as I can remember, but I apparently don’t acknowledge it as I should. I am a calculated risk taker meaning I only do things when I am certain I will succeed. I love adventure when I know the results will make me happy. I take jobs when I know I will be good at them. I believe in myself and am incredibly hard on myself. I have never felt scared or fearful. It wears a clever disguise.
What does fear of failure look like?
Incredible optimism mixed in with paralysis. Extreme highs in motivation with crippling days where productivity is not possible. Paralyzed.
Work ethic is not the problem. Hustle is not the problem. Skills, talent, smarts, strategy, knowledge, ability and drive not the problem. Fear of criticism is not the problem. Confidence is not the problem. Passion is not the problem and wanting to be happy, successful and doing what I love to do is definitely not the problem.
Apparently the problem is fear of failure. I like routines and systems and predictability and starting my own business is removing this comfort level of status quo and that throws me off even though I do my best to ignore it.
The reason I have always claimed to have a fear of success is whenever I get close to achieving anything, I suddenly lose interest and just stop. Completely erase the passion and drive. Gone. On to the next thing.
Will I Overcome My Fear of Failure?
My gift is strategy and perception. I always start at the finish line and work my way backwards. I see my finish line and I like what I see. I want to succeed in the direction I am headed more than anything. But I am already struggling and it is not going to be an easy road. I don’t think I can do it on my own. I’m a loner by nature, but I perform at my highest level when other people are counting on me. If I have any chance of carrying through on my journey, I need to surround myself with others who are determined and motivated or I will fail. I know myself.
Fear of failure sucks when you know you have what it takes.
It’s why I post everyday on Instagram and social media. It’s why I show up week after week and work really hard on my podcast. It’s why I write crappy articles on Medium several times a week and make tutorials as often as I can, and do a weekly live Q&A and work as hard as I can every single day.
I am relentless and doing everything I can to keep me moving forward as I know if I ever stop, my fear of failure will no longer be a fear. It will simply be failure and that is just not an option.
Will I fail? Not this time.
Learn. Create. Move Forward.